This movie did everything it could to draw me in. The producers even told me after the fact that they were in the pre-concept stage of this movie and discussed, “Y,all, let’s just put Tom Cruise in a not-too-distant setting with cool effects involving an -Earth-in-disaster scenario. Brian will eat it up with a spoon.” And I did-a large serving spoon that a ladle could ladle out of. Yes. That big. I appreciated that director Joseph Kosinski (of the Tron remake!) had Oblivion take place after Earth got the shit beat out of it by the aliens. Greater, still, is the movie doesn’t even use a crazy thousands-of-alien attack sequence-it focuses more on Cruise’s character and his path to realization. Now, in my humblest of opinions, all of the aha!-moments and twists were very obvious, and I assure you I am not smart. At all. Still, I could not help but be mesmerized by [and for that, fapping to] all the beautiful scenes of Earth being so destructed and desolate. It was nuts, by watching this right after Oz: The Great and Powerful, which was released about the same time as Oblivion earlier this year, how much the two were at opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of the visual effects. And without even looking into it, I bet my left arm the budget was bigger for Oz than for Oblivion. (Okay, so I had to look just now. I’m right. Obv.)
The movie had an elegance about it that, even though the story got pretty sci-fi towards the end, I could not get mad. I was originally upset because no one heard about this movie at first before it debuted. Shyamalan’s After Earth was making a splash in the news before it came out, and then Oblivion crept from under the bed sheets and was released before Shyamalan’s movie came out, which critics tore apart like Miley’s vagina by her 14 year old fans in her dreams. I feel awful for M. Night Shyamalan, but I’ll save that for my diary this evening. Though I have not seen his feature yet, Oblivion held its own indefinitely. And while it won’t make my top movie list (thanks for asking, though), I enjoyed the fuckoutofit.