It was Wednesday, May 5th, 2013. I quickly watched the recorded American Idol finale from Tuesday night to watch Candice and Kree sing off. Afterwards, I was quickly awash with feelings of being cheated on by a man/woman after a 12 year relationship. Now, let’s just skip past all the shouting and declarations of “I told you so,” and “Wait, he looks like a man that looks like a woman that looks like a man. Hang him!” I know you want to tell me the show has been “fixed” and “staged.” But this season made it truly obvious, and that’s why I’m leaving American Idol after a 12-year commitment of sweet-nothings and butterfly kisses.
Briefly, the producers went into this season back in January knowing its rating had kind of been sucking over time. So, they wanted to make sure a girl won (look at the lavish successes of Kelly and Carrie). They over-hyped the girls during audition weeks and semi-finals. The top 10 (5 boys, 5 girls) went week after week with sending a guy home. And then, hey top 5! All girls! What a shoo-in! Suddenly, the judges kept giving Candice standing-o’s (yep, standing-o’s, bitches) like it was, in fact, their jobs. Once Angie, the girl that should have won, got knocked out last week, they insured Candice’s victory with 3 stellar song-choices (producer-picked,no less) while giving good ol’ Kree some boring tunes to sing. Candice became a glorified Jesus-figure (proof in the pudding vine.co/v/bEerVDW7vEW )
So that completes phase I of my rant. Here, phase II discusses why Angie was supposed to win.
In the semi-finals (top 25? top 35? whatevs, it’s casual) she performed her own song, blew the judges (and the WORLD!) away. She avoided the bottom 3 for 10 weeks before mind-numbingly getting eliminated. Yet, returned to perform at the finale. And then, her own single was released on iTunes last night and has more positive reviews than Kree and Candice’s singles combined…and it’s only been 10 hours. MUAHAHAHAHA.
Anyway, NEVER AGAIN, AMERICAN IDOL!